As a Jewish immigrant from the former USSR, I grew up in an unapologetic Zionistic home. I always knew when I had children, they would go to a Jewish Day school, one of which would teach them to take great pride not only in their Judaism, but in the State of Israel.
So why, after 6 years at the same Jewish School, did I abruptly pull my daughter from the only school she had known?
It wasn’t the typical “the more money a family gave, the more control they had over everything” private school issue.
It wasn’t the fact the administration couldn’t decide wether they wanted a Reggio approach to the school, a “Montessori like” plan, or some other new curriculum trend that was making its way in the educational circles.
It wasn’t even the fact that we had to supplement my daughter’s education with a tutor for two years on top of the thousands of dollars in tuition we were paying as we became more aware that the school’s secular curriculum was becoming sub par to the public school’s in our area.
I was determined to do whatever it took to keep my child in a Jewish Day School that would teach her Zionism, and being a Jew, was something to be loud and proud of. Especially in a world that was becoming bamboozled by the BDS movement.
So what could have possibly pushed me over the edge? A Facebook post by the Head of School.
I had to blink a few times to understand what I was looking at…
Did the Head of School at my daughter’s Jewish Day School just post anti-Israeli propaganda to our school’s PUBLIC Facebook page?!
I was floored. Even after having many unpleasant interactions with this Head of School discussing her numerous attempts to separate Judaism and Zionism, I was shocked to see she would stoop this low.
I quickly called a girlfriend of mine to express my utter disgust. She simply replied “what do you expect from someone who refused to fly the Israeli flag outside the school until you made a huge stink about it?”.
I had enough. In a world where so many have such hostile negativities towards the only Jewish State, I refuse to not only send my daughter to a school that participates in this sort of brainwashing, but also having to pay an arm and a leg for it.
48 comments
I am a Christian myself from USA who also classifies himself as a Zionist, as I am a strong believer in Israel’s right to exist.
I think it is important for my fellow Christians to remember that Jesus Christ and his earliest disciples were all Jewish.
Apostle Paul who was a Jew with Roman citizenship and went onto preaching primarily to Gentiles, pointed out that a Jewish convert to the ChristIan faith would be accepted as a Jew and a Gentile convert as a Gentile.
Henceforth it was ok for Jewish converts to continue in many Jewish traditions including Chanukah, which I actually observe myself in addition to also observing Christmas (and there do exist some Jewish people that do observe Christmas).
Granted sure I am glad there are Jewish people who have decided to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and savior, although I am aware that some who have not accepted him as Messiah do acknowledge he existed (plus Jews and even Romans wrote their own historical records on Jesus and it’s amazing how much the Christian, Jewish and Roman sources have matched up).
But yeah each person Jew or Gentile, is going to make their own decisions on things, including what they believe, who they believe in or whether or not one believes the Messiah did or didn’t come.
And I believe you wanted what you felt was best for your child, especially due to how you wish for her to be raised.
DNA testing confirms me to be 2% Ashkenazi Jewish (one of many 2% in results), but I learned of Jewish ancestry before that and have observed Chanukah ever since.
And there is still more I learn as time goes on, and yes I feel you felt this would provide your daughter the education you sought for her, and it’s unfortunate a school like this would go against Israel and support Hamas, I remember arguing with a French girl who told me she was Jewish only to then tell me she opposed Israel and when I tried to tell her most of the people called Palestinians descend from Arab criminals kicked out of their birth places, she brushed me off and accused me of supporting violence and I thought to myself this girl says she’s Jewish but she’s a traitor to her people.
Anyways I believe you did the right thing as a mother, as I know how you want your daughter raised.
In today’s world of political liberalism, we must balance it with the right. Try a modern orthodox yeshiva for your kids! Even if you aren’t religious, your kids will grow with pride to be a Jew and a love of Israel that can’t be matched. As a first generation American of parents from the former Ussr I am so thankful to my parents for having given me that opportunity in life. There are programs that send kids to yeshivas for free, assuming you live nearby. Best of luck. Am yisrael chai!
Hi. I’m curious: why would you think people would be interested in the story behind a private parental decision you made? Do you want to hear about all of my parental decisions as I go? I can take each and every decision I make and stretch it out paragraph style for you to read if you like. But I’m guessing you have no interest in that. Now apply that same feeling to others in regards to your story. 🙂
Hi there! Considering I run a Jewish blog so yes, I think quite a few people would be very interested in this sort of topic. The post also hit google, acquiring more than 200k views in less than 2 weeks. So to answer your question again, yes. I always love hearing from my audience so feel free to drop me an email if you wish!
Enjoy the Chicago summer 😉
Good for you! So sad you had to do that. What a nerve of the principal!!
You did the right thing. “Staying the course and engaging in dialogue” suggestions are off base. Obviously someone promoting UNRWA in Jewish school is fully aware of what they’re doing. They’re not naive or ignorant and their agenda is to brainwash your child. No amount of reasoning and pleading is going to change that. You need to convince other parents who still think that being Jewish is not just about Bagels and Lox to pull their kids out of that cesspool.
I had a similar situation. After discovering several BDS activists teaching my children, I pulled them out. Then, the school sued us for full tuition!
I don’t know where you live, but the school does seem awful. Are there any alternatives?
While the administration’s decision was troubling, it may have been more productive to stay engaged at the school and try to affectuate change. Chances are other families felt the same as you, and your collective voices could have proven to be powerful–you did pay their salaries. By leaving, you silenced yourself.
And what of your child? Is there another day school to attend? Or is it off to a more liberal public school? Did you child like the school and have friends there? While I understand your displeasure-outrage, the decision to withdraw has many consequences.
The correct response is the one below- Donny has it right.. I hope you can pull it off.
Sadly, this is the face of the American Jewish community. Time to make Aliyah
I think it was a hard choice, but the right one. I’m wondering where other parents stand on this. Unfortunately most st people won’t speak up. What you did takes courage. Can you start a petition that stops this insane, self destructive narrative in the school? Will parents sign it? Her behavior is anti Semitic. There cannot be a separation between Judaism and the love of Israel (Zion). It’s the new anti Semitism to say, they don’t have a problem with Jews, but they do with Zionism. It’s an oxymoron.
You made the right choice. TOO often parents seem to expect their children to do the work of adults. I hear this often with Chritisns whose children’s beliefs are derided at school. That is NOT the job of the children. Their job is to be educated. When teachers or Admins play politics it’s the parent’s job to fight! For your kids. Pull enough kids out and see the change.
You should have kept her in and taught her to teach such people to see the other side of things. I’d return her to school & not disrupt her life at this formative time & deal separately with this principal. Show him palwatch.org & memritv.org. Meanwhile, it’s more important to be concerned with authentic Judaism being taught to & practiced toward students in ostensibly Jewish schools. Teaching kids that we care for & support each other, particularly Israelis as they are under constant attack, is, to me, a way of supporting the modern state of Israel that’s more important than waving a flag at an Israeli Independence Parade. The rabbi of our Chabad shul, one of several in Las Vegas, says a prayer at the Torah on Shabbos & Yom Tov for Israeli soldiers among all the Jewish inhabitants of Israel. This, of course includes blessings for all good people there too as the Torah says several times that the nations of the world are blessed through the blessing of the Jewish people.
I think you misunderstand what ‘authentic’ Judaism is, and the degree of mental illness that people like the head of the school are suffering from. This past Shabbat we read about ‘tzara’at’, which was an affliction caused by issues like lashon hara; the afflicted were separated from the community. One does not expose young children to a school in which the authority figure indoctrinates something that you will have to constantly try to counter. Furthermore, people who are trying to spread this disease are not amenable to facts, context, or rational argument. First you educate the child, and let’s be clear, education includes advocating for a particular set of values; that’s why a Jewish value is
שמע בני מוסר אביך ואל תיתוש תורת אימך.
‘Listen, my son, to the traditions of your father, and don’t forsake the teaching of your mother’ (Mishlei-Proverbs, 31).
I agree with these sentiments completely. Pirkei Avos teaches us the importance of being exposed to people of similar Jewish values. Why risk harming your child unnecessarily. It is not the job of a child to fight the adult’s battles, but simply to learn the proper values and the Torah way of life. To the writer, you absolutely did the right thing. Yasher koach!
What is truly disturbing is that the head of the school actually posted this for public to see. All parents of children in any school must be aware of the politics being fed to their children – but at a Jewish school? Unbelievable. I am sharing your post on Fb.
I find the headmaster’s post completely in line with what 70+ percent of Jews believe today. In truth, we are a sick people, who have a death wish. As many times as those who wish us dead, have tried to obliterate us, we just come back for more. The liberal Jewish community is to be feared, for they will be the ones who by their actions will be responsible for our destruction. I am not Orthodox, in fact, I am what is probably considered a secular Jew. But I am proudest of my Jewish blood and my heritage. I revel at the fact that we Jews, as small a people as we are have survived for over 3,000 years at all odds. I loathe those who constantly preach that we need to bring into our homes and hearts those who, without thought, would murder us. I fear for my children and grandchildren. Unfortunately, our worst enemies have become our own people. And very specifically, those who head up Jewish organizations. It is a sad world we live in. As one rabbi once said to me when I asked him why Jews support those who hate us, he replied that they must suffer from a genetic flaw, which very few of us escaped.
Good post!
What’s also upsetting is that instead of having the support of a majority of the parents in your private Jewish Day School to fire the Head of School you had to result in pulling out your child. If there aren’t more parents like you to speak up, the students of that school will be exposed to anti-Israel rhetoric which will only get worse.
Sad to see this, in light of the fact that the blockade is a necessity to protect Israeli citizens from a govt calling for its destruction
It is a fact UNRWA is notoriously anti-Israel, I agree that the above post is upsetting, lets talk about why there is a blockade in the first place, and who calls for the annihliation of Israel in the first place!
Jewish Day Schools are one of the last places to build a really a strong Jewish identify in children being raised in America. It is very hard to instill pride in your Jewish idendittv without a connection to Israel when we are fast approaching a time when the majority of the worlds Jews live in Israel. Although it is great to engage high school students in debate over current events in Israel as you would about current events in the USA, for younger kids, you need to instill as interest and connection to Israel that makes them feel like it is their cultural homeland and important.
Gaza blockade?! Wow I would expect this trash from Aljazeera not a JDS’s Facebook page. Shame on the school for hiring such a person! What are the Israeli families saying about this!?
Since when did the desire to see all people regardless of race, creed or religion become anti Jewish. As a proud Israeli I’m embarrassed by your inability to separate moral and political aims.
The fact that you see supporting Israel against propoganda like the one mentioned in my blog post is somehow tied to politics is truly sickening. My writing has NOTHING to do with politics but I’m seeing more and more when people don’t have an argument against logic, they quickly bring this topic into play.
You are spot on! And I am Israeli.
Ok, fess up: what school is it? No need to protect this.
I chose not to disclose the school or the mentioned Head of School for privacy reasons.
He should be exposed and face the music.
She 🙂 And I’ll keep it private, for now.
see https://www.frontpagemag.com/fpm/260366/bds-infests-jewish-day-school-ari-lieberman
Thank you! Thank you for having the moral clarity. For having courage and actually doing the right thing. As a fellow Russian Jew, and as a fellow parent, I understand what it takes and how challenging this decision is. As I was looking for a program to help my son prepare for anti-Israel onslaught while still in school, and not finding any that actually addressed the issues, I ended up starting a program myself! check it out, I’d love to offer this to NY community. clubzteens.org
During the Holocaust you had to be a hero to stand for Jews, now you need courage. You have courage and your daughter will appreciate it. Thank you.
Join Russian Jewish Community Foundation (RJCF.com) – proud Jewish community
You did the right thing. Israel makes you who you are. It’s like burning the flag. Who would do that. This lady has a rocky foundation. Teach your daughter yourself. And she will respect the family that she has. I think you did a courageous thing. And it will stand out to many parents !
Right on! Too bad this is becoming more and more widespread. Our people seem to have short memories and need horrible things to happen again and again to remember, it seems 🙁
Way to go! Stand up for Israel!
Good for you! You did the right thing for standing up for your daughters education and the state of Israel. You are brave and not many people are. I think homeschooling is a great alternative.
What the principal did was not ok in the slightest! When are we going to stop apologizing for having a strong country that can defend herself? Good for you for not only standing up for the education of your daughter, but also for the State of Israel!
I am shocked and dismayed that the Board of a JEWISH school is still paying this woman’s salary. Every parent should pull their children out of this school.
Yes,sad,indeed, if she was the only one who pulled her daughter out!
There have been NUMEROUS other families that have since left the school; nearly ALL citing similar reasons and a clear disdain for the Head of School mentioned in my article/blog post. I’m beyond sickened the School Board has allowed her to keep her position and aides in the demise of the School.
In 2018 Zionism is Judaism. Traditions and Laws are nice but if you don’t believe in our homeland why the hell do you follow the laws and customs.
complete agreement
Am Israel Chai!!!
There is enough anti Israel demons in the world, why do Jews have to join this bandwagon too? Unbelievable!!!!
Wow this is disturbing and shocking why would a Jewish school do that?
I cannot believe what I just read! Pity us all that this is what she did! Pathetic! Your friends should follow suit if they believe the Jews have a right to one tiny embattled country in this world. I live in it,and see how so many Jewish brothers and sisters in the USA sabotage us and spread lies about us! You are to be commended. This is really unbelievable ! We are our own sworst enemies! כל הכבוד!